We were late again, and I was rushing to get out the door. It was fifteen minutes to my daughter’s first dental appointment and we hadn’t even left the house, much less made our way through the traffic into town. I decided there wasn’t enough time to expect a three year old to put on her own shoes, so bent down to help her. “Hold my shoulder.” I told her, so she could keep balance. Instead Jessica held the top of my head and started pulling strands of hair across my face. I pulled away and started on the next shoe. She started playing with my hair again. I was already edgy that we were late and impatiently asked her, “Why do you keep messing up my hair? I just brushed it!” She was calm in spite of my intensity and answered, “Because I love you.”

That simple line and her sweet smile stopped me in my tracks. Kneeling down and hugging her, I said, “I love you too.”

Sure enough, we arrived late at the dentist’s, and ended up having to wait on those who were on time. I started to think about all the important and timely things I had to do rather than just waiting, but caught myself this time. Jessica climbed into my lap and asked me to read with her. We went through her new reader, taking turns reading pages. Then we had fun coloring a picture together, pretending to argue over who got to color what section.

When we were called into the dentist’s room, Jessica tried to be brave, but asked me in a trembling voice if she could sit on my lap. The dentist conceded and I sang to her softly while her teeth were being cleaned. She held my hand and made the most concerted effort of a three-year old to sit still. During the drive home in the heat, we rewarded Jessica with a fresh coconut, and sipped the cool coconut milk through straws.

We arrived home later than I had bargained for and I was already beginning to mentally plan my afternoon and how to make it in time for a meeting with some co-workers when Jessica smiled and surprised me when she said, “Thank you for the fun outing.”

I never deemed sitting in a chair with one’s mouth wide open getting a dental cleaning to be a “fun outing”. I realized then that it wasn’t the appointment, or the punctuality, or the long drive that mattered to her. What a little child sees is a special time with her mom; reading, coloring, singing and just being together.

As many times as I’ve read it or heard it stated from more experienced mothers, “Enjoy them while they are young!” and “They grow up so fast.” It’s still difficult to remember to focus on the joy of parenting, rather than trying to get one more thing knocked of the unending list of to-do’s. Sometimes it takes a little lesson, even if it comes from a three-year old, to keep in mind the real priorities in life: laughing, loving, and giving the best of our time to those whose love makes it worth it all.